‘Fast & Furious’ teaser inexplicably awesome
Paul: Do you want to maybe get some pizza? Vin: Uggggg. Gargle Gargle. Quarter-mile. Gargle.
How to re-energize a series that’s long run out of gas. (Pun!)
Step 1: Bring back the entire cast of the original, and then allude to this move with a clever tagline — “New model. Old parts.” Genius.
Step 2: Drop the articles. Words like “an” or “the” have become inefficient in our always plugged-in, increasingly on-the-run world.
Step 3: You top over a big motherfucking semi, then blow it up and then make it run off a cliff.
I’m not a fan of this series. The first installment (”The Fast and the Furious,” released in 2001, when “the” was still a popular word) was mediocre and overrated. The second, “2Fast2Furious” (directed by John “Boyz in Da Hood” Singleton) was surprisingly awful. And the third “Tokyo Drift” was decent if only for the ineffable appeal of drift racing.
So why do I find everything about this movie irresistible?
I wasn’t (consciously or subconsciously) pining for Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Michelle Rodriguez and Jordanna Brewster to get back behind the steering wheel for another go-round. I don’t care about these characters or these actors. I don’t care about engines or tires.
But there’s something so exquisite, so purely, wonderfully American about a big truck blowing up. And Summer ‘09 can’t get here quickly enough.
